Poems by O. F. Bergholz
We had a premonition of fire
We had a premonition
This fiery and tragic day
This day has come
Motherland!
My life, my breath
Take it!
Even to this day I have not forgotten
Years of oppression and hardship from evil
But then I was hit by a blinding flash of light and realized
It wasn't something that happened to me, it was something that happened to my country.
My country was standing firm and waiting.
No, I haven't forgotten!
Even if I die, even if I am condemned,
I will rise from the grave to answer the call of my country
Everyone will rise up, I'm not alone
I love my country.
Although it may be painful, I forgive everything with my blood-blooded love
My country received a crown of thorns
I see a dark rainbow overhead
Our time has come
And what does that mean?
Only I and my country know
I love my country - that's the only way I can do it
My country and I are still one
1941
(Translated by Mitsuru Eguchi)
From "Leningrad Poems"
I will never forget one night that marked a turning point.
December: Darkness without lights
I was on my way home with bread in my hand.
Suddenly, my neighbor appeared before my eyes.
"In exchange for a dress
If you don't want to exchange, give it to me as a favor to a friend.
It's been ten days since my daughter died and we haven't even had a funeral.
I need a coffin, and they'll make one for me in exchange for bread.
So please give it to me, you've already had a child..."
I said
"I won't give it to you."
And clutched tightly the meager piece of bread
she said
"Give it to me. You lost a child too.
I brought flowers to put on your grave."
...As if at the very end of the earth
As if they were fighting violently in the darkness
We two girls were walking side by side
Two Mothers, Two Leningrad Citizens
And she was like she was possessed
He pleaded long and painfully and timidly.
I finally
I didn't exchange my bread for a coffin
And finally, I brought her back to her senses.
He said darkly.
"Here, eat this piece, eat it... I'm sorry!
I don't regret it for the sake of those who are still alive - don't think it's strange."
... I survived December, January, and February.
I repeat the shivers of happiness
Nothing is wasted for the living -
Tears, joy, and passion
War in your face
As a baton of eternal life inherited from a friend
Hold this vow high
They are my countless friends, my friends, my hometown, the friends of Leningrad.
Oh, without friends
In the midst of a bitter siege
We would have decayed
1942
(Translated by Mitsuru Eguchi)
To the Lady of Leningrad
Your appearance and your way of life
Songs of praise will be written
But I'm sure you'll think like this
"This isn't me"
"I was more normal and unsociable."
It was all scary and depressing.
I was tormented by the bloody war.
I never even dreamed of being happy
All I wanted was rest.
I wanted to be free from everything in this world.
From the days of searching for warmth, a home, and food
I feel this way every time I see my child in such a weak state.
From the pain in my chest and the premonition of endless disaster
From the anxiety of thinking about those who haven't heard from me
(Will we meet again?)
From the howling of bombs falling on unprotected roofs
I wanted to be free from both courage and anger.
But I remained in the city of sadness
As the lord of my town, as my servant
To protect light and lives
Even though I was exhausted, I survived
But sometimes I sang. I worked anyway.
They shared salt and water with their neighbors.
I cried when I was alone, I argued with my neighbors
My mind was full of food.
Day by day my face grew darker
There are some gray hairs on the temples.
But my hands can do anything.
He became like an iron fist.
Look at those rough fingers. They look strong.
They dug a moat at the nearby city limits.
I also made a sturdy coffin.
I also bandaged the injured child.
These days have not come without leaving their mark
The smell of lead never fades
The reality of war, the sadness itself
In the knowing eyes of the women of Leningrad
Why me?
Have you ever painted it so bravely and beautifully?
Proud woman in her prime,
A bright, smiling face?
In spite of harsh criticism
The painter will proudly say
"You are love and life,
It represents the tenacity and glory of Leningrad."
1942
(Translated by Mitsuru Eguchi)
Kids, put your hands up!
I saw the boy at the hospital.
The bullets killed the boy's sister and mother.
The boy lost both of his arms from the elbow down.
The boy was five years old at the time.
The boy was studying music and he worked hard.
I liked playing with a green round ball.
And now I'm lying here, trying not to groan.
The boy already knew that crying in battle was shameful.
Lying quietly in a soldier's cot
He stretched out both his amputated arms as if to warn...
Wow, what tenacity for a child!
Curse the warmongers!
Across the Sea
Build bombers one after another
I forced my tears on the children whose tears had not yet dried.
To those who seek to harm the children of the world again
Curse you
Oh, how many children have lost legs and arms!
A small walking stick
Striking the dry surface of the earth
Unlike any other sound on earth
A high-pitched sound resounds
Don't forget that regret
Little people with disabilities
Wherever the peacekeepers are
I want to stand shoulder to shoulder with the bravest people.
I hope
When the world becomes calm
For lasting peace
For the happiness of others
Sky-high
Raise your severed hand
Shattered my childhood
Let's denounce those who started the war.
May we never escape our coming judgment.
1949
(Translated by Mitsuru Eguchi)
Encounter with Victory
"Hello……"
My heart and my conscience
With breathing,
And with all my life I say to you
"Hello, hello"
The sound was struck at the time of the rendezvous.
A bright moment in the destiny of man has come
I am most proud of these four years.
I loved and believed with the Russian faith.
I'm sure I can wait
Whether alive or dead
In any case
I can wait for you
And I was able to welcome you back alive...
"Hello……"
What else can I say?
My lips are distorted by heat
Tears burn my eyes
You are more beautiful than I ever dreamed
Infinite light and glory
It is the power of power.
You are like the day the earth was born
Shining in the morning glow
You are the white blossoms of the apple
Sprinkle on the earth from above
You are more joyful than a lullaby
Full of hopes and dreams
That's how you looked... That's how you appeared...
You breathed such warmth into the world...
No, I don't know the right words for you
You are a victory. You are far beyond words.
Experience your awesome happiness
I know your difficult ways
I swear to you, I swear to you, victory
For myself and all my friends
I swear, in our new life
Let's not forget anything
The precious blood of the people
Your battle days will remain in your memory forever.
Your solemn holidays
I won't forget what you say
But in all things, let us be worthy of these things.
I live solely for the prosperity of my country.
vow to work
That border is no longer valid
To prevent any enemy from straddling it
Your immortal flame
So that it may continue to shine in everyone's hearts
For the happiness of our beloved country
For your proud people
1945
(Translated by Sylvia Kakehari)
Blockade Swallow
Spring of '42
Many people in Leningrad
He had a badge on his chest.
A badge of a swallow with a letter in its beak
Through the years, joys and misfortunes
It will continue to shine forever
That spring of '42
Spring in a besieged town
A little tin swallow
I also had it on my chest.
It was a sign of good news.
It meant "I'm waiting for a letter."
This inscription is a blockade invention.
We knew, only the plane
Only the birds, from their beloved homeland
If you can come to Leningrad
I wonder how many letters have been sent since then.
But why have I been here until now?
The letter I wanted most
You may feel that you are not receiving
In the scorching heat of midday
As if my lips were drawn to the spring
To the life that emerges behind the words
To the truth imbued in every line
Hold on with your conscience
Who was supposed to write it? Who was supposed to send it?
Happiness, victory or misfortune?
Or I will forever find
A friend you can't tell apart?
Or is the letter I long for like light
Are you wandering somewhere?
I searched for my address but couldn't find it
Are you yearning for an answer somewhere?
Or is that day already near?
When your heart is filled with great peace
A message sent during the war
The day I will surely receive the timeless news I have never heard before
Oh, find me, long with me
You have been with me for a long time now through all things.
Even by that strange swallow when we were under siege during the war.
Because it was promised to me
1945
(Translated by Sylvia Kakehari)
Heart to heart
Heart to heart
That's the only way
I decided that the road was straight and scary
I'm single-minded and there's no turning back
That path is visible to everyone, but it has no glory.
I speak for all those who lost their lives here.
In my poems, their dull footsteps
It's filled with the eternal hot breathing
I speak for all the people who live here.
For those who have survived fire, death and ice
People, as those who suffered together, as your flesh
I speak
And I become a medium for expressing the images, hearts and words of countless people.
Immerse yourself in the various aspects and hearts of people and be yourself within them
In someone's sadness, in someone's joy
Listen to your own quiet sighs and whispers
And make sure you're not hiding anything
That is my destiny
Everyone can hear everything, even the stifled sobs
And my friends have shared my pain
My enemies laugh
That's fine, this is the only thing I can do.
Don't accept charity, don't expect it, don't ask for it
For happiness, just create and give
Isn't it my country that has taught me this once again?
...And I saw the outline of my homeland again
Bloody and immortal, bitter passion
1942: Wild Summer
All living things rose up in the struggle against death...
August 1946
(Translated by Mitsuru Eguchi)
"Inscription at the Piskaryov Cemetery* written by Bergoritz at the request of many citizens"
This is where Leningraders rest
Men, women and children sleeping
And next to me a Red Army soldier sleeps
At the risk of one's own life
The cradle of revolution
They who defended Leningrad
I cannot write their precious names here.
There are so many of them, forever protected under the granite monuments
But to those who gaze upon this tombstone,
No one is forgotten and nothing is forgotten
(Translated by Mitsuru Eguchi)
*Piskarevskoye Cemetery
A cemetery outside Leningrad (St. Petersburg) where many of the victims of the Siege of Leningrad are buried